Expectation: A Note from Your Minister

Dear WUU community,

Welcome to a new year! For many of us, this is back-to-school time, with all the excitement of new classes, new friends, and new challenges. Here at WUU, we are in back-to-school mode too, with religious education classes starting up again on Sept. 15 and our annual Ingathering/Water Communion service even sooner, this coming Sunday. By now you’ve heard a ton of reminders about our new service times, at 9 a.m. and 11:15 a.m. We hope to see you at either service, and don’t forget about the pancake breakfast during the Middle Hour on Sept. 8!

This month we’re also exploring a new spiritual theme: what does it mean to be a people of Expectation? Here are just a few of the questions on my mind about the expectations we have of ourselves and others.

First, what do we expect of ourselves? Some of us are very hard on ourselves. We set high expectations for ourselves and then, when we fall short of perfection, we judge ourselves far more harshly than anyone else would. Some of us have internalized others’ negative expectations of us, doubting our own potential and our own strength. If we can learn to see ourselves more clearly and kindly, with realistic expectations for ourselves, we will liberate the best that is in us.

This applies to our relationships with the ones we love too. When we expect the best from someone else, it can help that other person be their best self. But, when we get trapped in old, outdated and limited expectations of what someone else is capable of, it can cause a world of pain and frustration for both parties. How can we use our expectations of our loved ones wisely, to support but not to stifle and limit each other?

And another question: what do we expect from the world, in the most basic sense? Many of us have been through personal and collective struggles and difficulties that rock our sense of trust in the goodness of this world. Yet, for happiness to be possible, we have to make peace with the uncertainty and challenges of life. We have to believe and expect that life is worth living. We have to come to trust the world and the mysterious source behind it. Finding that place of trust and hopeful expectation is a universal human challenge that will take us to the very core of our spirituality.

But it’s not just about our individual happiness, is it? In this moment in our country and our world, it is so important for us all to bring to the table our most hopeful, vibrant selves and our highest expectations for what our common life can be. If we give up, despair, numb out and tune out, we are squandering our potential to make a difference. If we expect the worst from our neighbors, we might just get it. But when we expect the best not just from ourselves but from our neighbors and our society, we are helping to create the conditions for more goodness and positive change to emerge.

So consider well what you expect from yourself, your loved ones, your country, and your world. Setting expectations that are kind, wise, hopeful, and grounded in reality is essential for our long-term happiness, and maybe even for the shared future we long for.

In faith,
Rev. Laura